At today's White House press conference, the President spoke about an issue deeply concerning to all Americans. "A man came up to me with tears in his eyes", he said, "Sir, I've heard that many schools in this great Nation of ours have come under the influence of Sharia law and are now using Arabic numbers in their courses. I'm terrified that my children will be forced to use this demonic system." In the interest of Making America Great Again, I have just written a new Executive Order that bans all Arabic numbers in the schools and in all American business transactions. From now on, all algebra will be done with real American numbers. All of your algorithms will be translated into American.

MAKE ARITHMETIC GREAT AGAIN!